Guilt-Free Motherhood
By Dr. Julianna Slattery
Reviewed by: Ashley Davis
How often in motherhood do you feel guilty? You’re hiding under laundry mountain, your middle-ist just bit your little-ist, your oldest is way past his screen time limit, and you’re sure the mom next to you is doing it better. We’ve all been there! In her book Guilt-Free Motherhood, Dr. Julianna Slattery gives no-nonsense direction about parenting with Godly wisdom. This book is bound to be an encouragement to you.
Personally, I found this book refreshing. There are so many voices telling mothers how they should parent, what is right, and what is wrong. Oftentimes, we don’t stop to consider what the Bible really says about parenting our children – I know I’ve been there! We hear something another mom or influencer says and it sounds good to us, so we go with it. That won’t happen with this book. The principles are Biblical and trustworthy.
In the first part of the book, Slattery lays the foundation for the whole thing: “Instead of feeling fully responsible for the lives of our children, we become fully responsible for our faithfulness to our Savior” (21). At the crux of this book is the relieving truth that if we’re faithful to God, we have no better option than to simply trust him with how our kids “turn out.” We’re not in control of that – a fact that should bring us peace, not despair and anxiety. Trusting Jesus is our best option. And while all those things are true, we have an incredible influence that we can extend into our children’s lives for the glory of God.
In the second part, we take a deeper look into using Proverbs as our blueprint for guilt-free, Bible-based motherhood. Slattery argues that seeking wisdom and using it as the bedrock for our motherhood is critical to living fully into this God-given role. She also emphasis a healthy respect, awe, and fear of the Lord as directed by his Word (Proverbs 9:10). Without this respect for authority – God’s authority and parents’ authority – we set our children up for future failure. Slattery really digs into the nitty-gritty here; she doesn’t avoid the hard topics. From teaching Biblical standards to consequences for misbehavior, she “goes there” in this section.
We learn about the Seven Parenting Pillars of Wisdom (PURPOSE): Productivity, Uncompromising Integrity, Restrained Speech, Positive Relationships, Openness to Feedback, Self-Control, and Eye to the Future. The importance of each of these pillars is supported by scripture and bolstered by practical ideas for teaching them to your children. The final chapter of the second section is aptly summed up by this quote: “A fine line separates influence and control. God has given us one, not the other. We have great influence but no control. Ironically, grasping for control is the greatest threat to our influence. Guilt-free motherhood does not mean that you perfectly dictate the choices of your children. Instead, you strive to faithfully use your influence” (169).
In the third and final part of the book, Slattery presents the readers with most of the excuses any mom could come up with to stay stuck in their old ways and not give guilt-free motherhood a try.
Here are some quotes I liked from Guilt-Free Motherhood:
“My goal as a mother used to be to raise my kids to be wonderful adults. I am beginning to understand that my job is simply to honor God through each day that I have” (21).
“Many of today’s cultural parenting problems are the direct result of our lax attitude toward God’s authority” (84).
“The truth is that many variables besides parenting impact the life of a child. You can do everything right and still never be guaranteed happy, healthy, God-fearing children. By trying to control what you can’t, you compromise the powerful role of motherhood. The wisdom of guilt-free motherhood is being fully devoted to your God-given influence while resting in the limits to it” (171).
“Pride is the archenemy of wisdom” (201).
“Motherhood is just one aspect of your pilgrimage in serving God on this earth. Although it is a powerful and consuming commission, motherhood was never intended to overshadow your relationship with God. God has given you children so that you can express your faithfulness and love to Him. Your children must never replace God as the defining factor or vessel of hope in your life” (242).
Audience: mothers – most applicable to moms with kids still living at home.
Usefulness Rating: Super useful. This book isn’t fluff or just mindset shifts for mama. It has practical, direct information about Biblical parenting.
Entertainment Value: This was an easy, highlight-able read, and of course it had plenty of stories that moms would find funny. Motherhood’s a crazy ride like that.
Good for Groups: This book has a study guide at the conclusion that could be used for group or personal study.
For more information about this book or other reading suggestions, feel free to contact me directly.
